1 Corinthians 7
The Corinthians sent Paul a question, and you can almost hear the slogan behind it: "It is good for a man not to touch a woman." Some had decided the body was the problem and marriage a lower, fleshly thing. Paul does not take the bait. He honors the single life and the goodness of marriage in the same breath, and from the foundation in Genesis 21 he refuses to rank them. Both are gifts. Both are callings. The question was never which one is holier.
What follows is some of the most tender counsel in any letter. Paul writes to the married and the widowed, the single and the enslaved, to a believer lying awake beside a spouse who does not share the faith. You are bought with a price, he keeps saying. Christ owns you. So abide where you were called, keep your covenants, and hold the passing world lightly. The time is short. Whatever you choose, choose it free.
Tap any highlighted phrase to jump to the commentary that unpacks it.
1 Corinthians 7:1-2It Is Good
1Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman
These are the Corinthians' own words, quoted back to them. Paul does not contradict the slogan outright; he lets it stand and then complicates it. There really is a good in continence, in a single-hearted devotion the married rarely get to keep. But good is not the same as required, and it is not the only good on the table.
2Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.
Paul adds a word that shifts the whole discussion. Yes, continence is good. But marriage is also good - and for many, necessary. Marriage is not second-best spirituality; it is a remedy for human passion, a safeguard against fornication. It is also the normal context where a man and woman live as companions. See the foundation in Genesis 21, where God says "It is not good that the man should be alone."
1 Corinthians 7:3-4Defraud Not
3Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.
The word "due benevolence" is opheile - what is owed. A debt of kindness. Paul is saying something no pagan moralist of his era would say: a man and woman in marriage owe each other not just obedience or children, but affection. Tenderness. Care. And he says it both ways, husband to wife and wife to husband, in an age that almost never imagined the debt running in both directions.
4The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.
This is the most radical verse on marriage in the ancient world. The wife has authority over the husband's body. The husband has authority over the wife's body. Not as masters. As covenanted partners. Mutuality. Neither is the autonomous owner of their own flesh; both belong to each other in a sacred exchange.
1 Corinthians 7:5-6Refrain by Consent
5Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
"Defraud" means to rob, to deprive. If you refrain from each other, it must be by mutual agreement and for a purpose - prayer, fasting, spiritual discipline. But it cannot be indefinite. Both partners' needs matter. Both are due care. Any withholding that becomes unilateral or permanent is a form of theft from the marriage covenant.
1 Corinthians 7:7-9Each His Own Gift
7For I would that all men were even as I myself: but every man hath his proper gift of God
Paul is saying he is unmarried - and he wishes everyone had the freedom he has. But he immediately qualifies: not everyone has that gift. Some are built for marriage. Some for singleness. These are not moral achievements. They are gifts, distributions from God to different people.
8I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I:
9But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.
Here Paul is startlingly honest, and if you have ever felt ashamed of how much you long for marriage, hear him gently. The desire is not a failure of holiness. The passions are real, the loneliness is real, and Paul will not pretend otherwise. He says it plainly: better to marry than to burn. Marriage is no grudging concession to weakness; for the one who cannot contain, it is the wiser and the kinder road.
1 Corinthians 7:10-11Hold the Marriage Together
10And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband
Paul invokes the Lord's word directly. The marriage covenant is not meant to be dissolved. A wife should not leave her husband. But Paul will immediately add: if she does, she must remain unmarried or be reconciled. The binding force is the covenant itself, not the civil law or the culture.
11(But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband:) and let not the husband put away his wife.
Paul is remarkably balanced. He says the wife should not depart - but acknowledges she might. If she does, her options are two: remain unmarried (honoring the marriage covenant even in separation) or be reconciled. The goal is always reconciliation. The breach is never God's design.
1 Corinthians 7:12-16The Believing Spouse and the Unbeliever
12But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away.
Paul distinguishes here: he is not quoting the Lord's words, but his own pastoral judgment. The question is specific: a believer married to an unbeliever. The covenant of marriage is already made. Paul's counsel is urgent: do not end it unilaterally. If the unbeliever is willing to stay, the believer should stay.
13And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him.
14For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.
This is a stunning claim. The believing spouse does not make the unbeliever a Christian. But there is a holiness that extends through the marriage covenant. The children are not defiled; they are included in the sphere where God's grace moves. The believer's faithfulness sanctifies the home.
15But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.
Here Paul gives permission, not command. If the unbeliever leaves - if they will not stay in the marriage - the believer is free. Not obligated to pursue an impossibility. God's calling is to peace, not to endless suffering in a marriage the other person has already abandoned.
1 Corinthians 7:17-24Abide in Your Calling
17But as God hath distributed to every man, as the Lord hath called every one, so let him walk
Paul steps back from the marriage question to give a principle that covers everything. Each person has been distributed a share - a gift, a calling. Whatever that is, that is the shape of your obedience. Not where you wish you were. Not where you think is holier. Where God has called you.
20Let every man wherein he is called, therein abide with God
Here is the key word: abide. Stay where you are. God has called you into a particular shape of life. The vocation is not the enemy. The failure to embrace it is. Paul applies this principle to the Corinthian household2 - married and single alike remain in their calling, not as slaves to circumstance but as servants of Christ.
21Art thou called being a servant? care not for it: but if thou mayest be made free, use it rather.
Paul is addressing enslaved believers. Your freedom would be good - but not at the cost of betraying your oath to your master or your Lord. If you can gain freedom honorably, do so. But do not mistake freedom from slavery as the measure of your spiritual state. You can be Christ's slave while legally enslaved, and you can be a slave to sin while legally free.
22For he that is called in the Lord, being a servant, is the Lord's freedman: likewise also he that is called, being free, is Christ's servant.
23Ye are bought with a price; be not ye the servants of men.
1 Corinthians 7:25-31The Time Is Short
25Now concerning virgins I have no commandment of the Lord: yet I give my judgment, as one that hath obtained mercy of the Lord to be faithful.
Paul is cautious. On the question of unmarried believers, he says: I am not quoting Jesus. I am giving you my reasoned judgment from a life of faithfulness. That humility matters. He is not the Lord. But he has walked with the Lord, and he speaks from that experience.
26I suppose therefore that this is good for the present distress, that it is good for a man so to be
Something heavy is pressing on this church - the "distress" Paul names hangs over the whole paragraph: persecution, instability, a community bracing for hard days. Read his counsel in that light. When the ground is shaking, fewer entanglements can be a mercy: the single believer is freer to flee, to suffer, to go where the married cannot easily follow. This is wisdom for a particular moment, not a law clamped onto every age.
29But this I say, brethren, the time is short
Whether Paul means the imminent return of Christ or the brevity of human life, the counsel is the same: do not treat temporary things as permanent. Do not let the world's goods, relationships, or status become your anchor. This eschatological urgency3 shapes not just Paul's marital counsel but his entire ethical vision.
30And they that weep, as though they wept not; and they that rejoice, as though they rejoiced not; and they that buy, as though they possessed not; 31And they that use this world, as not abusing it: for the fashion of this world passeth away.
Paul is painting a picture of detachment - not coldness, but a kind of freedom. Weep when grief comes; rejoice when joy comes. Buy what you need. Use the world. But hold it all lightly. The fashion of this world - the way it looks, the way it orders itself - is passing away.
1 Corinthians 7:32-35Undivided Care
32But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord:
33But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife; 34And his care is divided. There is a difference also between a wife unmarried and a virgin: the unmarried careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.
Paul is not saying married people cannot please God. He is saying marriage divides your care. You love your spouse. You provide for your children. You think about household needs. That is good work. But it is a division of the single-pointed focus the unmarried can have.
35And this I say for your own profit; not that I may cast a snare upon you, but for that which is comely, and that ye may attend upon the Lord without distraction.
Paul keeps his reason clear: he is speaking to their advantage. He is not legislating. He is pointing out what he sees. The unmarried can attend to the Lord without distraction. The Greek word is aperispastos - undistracted, not pulled in competing directions. That is a gift. Some have it. Some do not.
1 Corinthians 7:36-40No Sin in Marriage, But....
36But if any man think that he behaveth himself uncomely toward his virgin, if she pass the flower of her age, and need so require, let him do what he will; he sinneth not
Paul is addressing a specific cultural situation: a father or guardian who has promised a young woman to singleness (perhaps in virginity for spiritual reasons), and now realizes that is not working. She is older. She wants to marry. Paul says: there is no sin in letting her marry. Let her have her freedom.
37Nevertheless he that standeth stedfast in his heart, having no necessity, but hath power over his own will, and hath so decreed in his heart that he will keep his virgin, doeth well;
But if the decision is firm - if the young woman herself is resolved to remain single, and she is not being coerced, and she truly can "contain" (hold herself in) - then that too is fine. Paul affirms her choice.
38So then he that giveth her in marriage doeth well; but he that giveth her not in marriage doeth better
Here Paul uses the word "better" for the first time. Marriage is good. But singleness, given the brevity of time and the undivided attention it permits, is better - not in moral status, but in practical advantage for serving Christ. This is a pastoral observation, not a spiritual law.
39The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord. 40But she is happier if she so abide, after my judgment: and I think also that I have the Spirit of God.
Paul ends with a word about widows. They are free to remarry. But he suggests - once again, as his reasoned judgment - that they will be happier (more at peace, more fulfilled) if they remain unmarried. Yet even here, he does not make it a law. He appeals to their own sense of what God would have for them.
Further study
- Jewish textual tradition on Adam and Eve's union - the foundation for Paul's theology of one flesh.
- Archaeological evidence for first-century Corinthian domestic life and social hierarchy - the household Paul addresses.
- Paratactic Apostolic CounselPerseus Digital LibraryGreek rhetorical patterns in Stoic and apostolic letters - models for Paul's style of reasoning in 1 Corinthians 7.
Where this echoes in Scripture
Defraud Not
- 1 Corinthians 6:19-20your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you... ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price.The prior surrender beneath verse 4 - you were not your own owner before marriage ever asked you to share.
- Ephesians 5:28-29So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies... even as the Lord the church.The mutual belonging of verses 3-4 carried further - a love that nourishes the other as one’s own flesh.
- Genesis 2:24Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.The one-flesh union that grounds the shared authority of verse 4.
Abide in Your Calling
- 1 Peter 1:18-19ye were not redeemed with corruptible things, as silver and gold... but with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot.The price behind “bought with a price” (v. 23) - not coin, but the blood of Christ.
- Galatians 3:28There is neither bond nor free... for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.The reversal of verse 22 - slave and free leveled by belonging to Christ.
- Romans 6:18Being then made free from sin, ye became the servants of righteousness.The double freedom of verses 22-23 - freed from one master to serve a truer one.
- John 8:36If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed.The freedom that outranks any legal status (vv. 21-22) - the freedom only Christ gives.